Raymond Charles DePalma, Sr. 

Raymond Charles DePalma, Sr. January 6, 1935-July 31, 2025

Predeceased by his wife Catherine Patricia DePalma in 1995.

Survived by his children Kathleen (Tom) Skibinski, Karianne (Bert) DePalma and Raymond, Jr. (Patty) DePalma and Sally Saltsman, his loving partner of 28 years. Grandchildren: Tom, Jenna, Jack & Owen, Joe & Aerin, Sophie, Raymond, Lily, Rachel, Colin and Ruby. Many nieces, nephews, cousins, extended family and friends.

Ray was the fourth son of Michael and Frances DePalma, brothers Mike, Pat and Art. He was born on the second floor of the DePalma Restaurant on Lake Avenue in 1935. He frequently told stories of growing up in the restaurant: holiday celebrations with all of his aunts, uncles and cousins, summer days at Charlotte Beach- having 2 Abbott’s custard cones a day, attending Holy Cross School, hanging out with his childhood pals and playing baseball as a young boy through high school.

He joined the Navy at age 21, soon after he and his new wife Pat moved to San Diego where he was stationed. They enjoyed their new life in Southern California which included great weather, the beach and new friendships. They moved back to Rochester in 1960 after his Father died to help his Mother with the family restaurant. After a short stint back at Kodak, Ray enrolled as a full time student at St. John Fisher College, graduating with his Bachelor’s Degree in Accounting.

Ray worked for the Federal Government, Department of Defense, in the DCAA (Defense Contract Audit Agency) for 30 years. He utilized his accounting degree to audit classified Defense Department contracts. His professional career was wholly at DCAA, with his base office here in Rochester, traveling throughout the U.S. frequently. Ray ultimately became the Manager of the Rochester office, receiving many awards and accolades throughout his career.

Ray and Pat built their home in Orchard Brook on Mont Morency Drive where they raised their 3 children: Kathy, Kari and Ray Jr. So many cherished memories made there over the years: The swimming pool was the main summer event often including family and friends. Ray’s big screen TV was another attraction and cause for parties, especially to watch sports. Boston Red Sox games and Buffalo Bills games took top billing as his favorite teams. Neighborhood gatherings were special and made for close bonds.

Ray’s love of baseball included coaching Ray Jr. in his favorite pastime. This created a strong bond between them along with many of Ray Jr.’s friends. He loved sports &

competition, putting on the Summer Olympics at our pool many summers for his kids and the Henneberg cousins. He would list out the events and keep track of race wins, jumping and diving scores, and pair us up for team events. We looked forward to this every year and were thrilled to be a part of it.

Our family took annual Easter vacations to Myrtle Beach, SC. Ray was known for finding shark’s teeth and would set the alarm early each morning to catch the low tide. Close neighborhood families joined in on the Myrtle Trips and the annual vacations got even better, filled with lots of beach time, shopping, restaurants, sunburns and laughter thanks to daily happy hours.

After his wife passed, Ray was fortunate to meet Sally who became his beloved partner of 28 years. They enjoyed an active, busy lifestyle including diligently attending the YMCA many times per week, eating healthy, traveling and wintering in Florida for 3 months for over 20 years. Ray played senior baseball in Rochester and Florida until he was 82. Gardening & spending time outdoors were another passion, spending hours planting, pruning, weeding in the warm weather, and caring for his indoor plants in the off season.

The greatest joy in Ray’s family life were his grandchildren. He made it a priority to spend time with the kids whether it be at family gatherings, school events or his favorite- attending their sporting events. Whether it was Tommy and Joey playing baseball, Raymond soccer and golf games, Sophie, Lily and Ruby lacrosse games, Rachel at volleyball or softball games, or Colin’s basketball games, Grandpa wanted to hear all about it. He was so proud of each of them whether it was a win or a loss, he would tear up telling them how great they were and amazed he was with each kid.

As a family we took many big vacations together, including all 16 of us. Among these were many Disney World trips, Myrtle Beach Easter weeks and for his 80th birthday all to Riviera Maya, Mexico to celebrate. We love the story of him wearing shorts to a high end restaurant and them making him change into a pair of resort provided pants. The pants were way too big and he had to hold them up the whole time, luckily the dinner was worth it.

In recent years, Ray’s favorite times were celebrating family milestones together: high school and college graduations, birthdays, engagements, weddings and births. He was overjoyed to become a Great Grandfather to Tom and Jenna’s boys Jack and Owen in 2024 & 2025. Fortunately we celebrated his 90th Birthday in January of this year. It was a special day where each grandchild wrote and read a memory that they shared with their Grandpa. This meant the world to both him and each of us.

Raymond Charles DePalma, Sr. certainly lived a long, happy and active life filled with countless memories with family and friends. To say that we will miss him is an understatement, but we will cherish him and all that he did for us forever. He won the life lottery…and he knew it.

Calling Hours will be held on Wednesday August 6th, 4-7 PM at Vay-Schleich & Meeson 1075 Long Pond Road. His Funeral Mass will be celebrated on Thursday August 7th, 9:30 at Our Mother of Sorrows Church 5000 Mt. Read Blvd. Interment, Holy Sepulchre Cemetery.

In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to The Northwest Family YMCA. Northwest Family YMCA 730 Long Pond Rd Rochester, NY 14612 OR  RochesterYMCA.org/donate in his memory.